And Then it Dawned on Them…Licensing police turn up en-mass to ban the pub band ’4am’

Read more Bollox Britain at MelonFarmers.co.uk

Thanks to Nick See article from bbc.co.uk

Confusion over a band called 4am and the time the group was due to perform on stage, prompted a visit from licensing officers and police to a local pub. The Feathers in Laleham, Surrey, had advertised live musicfrom 4am . Two licensing officers and two police officers visited the pub the day before to stop the performance, before being told it was the name of the band. The pub’s licensee, Kate Dillon, said she was speechless after the visit. She said: If one official turns up that’s funny enough, but if four people come into the pub like they did, it’s absolutely ridiculous. When I calmed down a bit I thought it was absolutely hilarious. They made idiots of themselves really. The two-piece band, of Joe Becket and John Adams, was named after a track by jazz musician Herbie Hancock.

Screwed by Repressive Policing…A Serbian Film allegory extends to Northampton Blockbuster

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Thanks to Simon Based on article from dogatemywookie.co.uk

On Friday 21st January 2011 the Police raided an unsuspecting Blockbuster in Northampton upon receiving a complaint from a ‘distressed’ viewer and seized copies of the film despite the BBFC rating on the front and the content warning in large letters on the back. The police with their usual, the complainant is always right, attitude didn’t check with the BBFC before raiding the store for a perfectly legal film. Blockbuster has now withdrawn the film from it’s catalogue pending consultation with their lawyers. Northamptonshire police sent dogatemywookie.co.uk the statement: We received information from a member of the public that a copy of The Serbian Film at a branch of Blockbusters in Northampton contained images of child abuse. We have a duty to investigate such claims and in agreement with the manager of the shop took a copy away to view and check that it was the edition that has been approved by the British Board of Film Classification for distribution. It has been established as a legitimate copy of the film that has been approved for distribution by the BBFC and so is being returned to the shop.

Police Censors…Police ban ITV News reporters from press conferences over supposedly unfavourable reporting.

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See article from guardian.co.uk

ITV News has been allowed back into press conferences about the murder of Joanna Yeates, after Avon & Somerset police lifted a ban on the broadcaster. The force prohibited ITV News reporters from attending a press briefing on the murder case, after broadcasting what it deemed an unfair, naive and irresponsible report on ITV1′s News at Ten. According to ITV’s head of home news, Toby Castle, police said the broadcaster was allowed to attend future press conferences after accurate and counterbalanced reporting at lunchtime. However, the constabulary said it would not hesitate to adopt similar tactics if the media hampers our investigation.

Police Dicks…Police censors confiscate willy garden ornament

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Based on article from gazettelive.co.uk See also free-willy.org.uk

A curiosity shop owner and councillor has had his stone willy seized by police after complaints it was supposedly obscene. Jason Hadlow, chairman of Yarm Town Council and owner of the Simply Dutch store in Leeming Bar, North Yorkshire, was left gobsmacked at the confiscation. Now he faces an £80 fine to get his 4ft high masonry manhood back – something he has refused to do. Hadlow has instead ordered 150 more of the garden ornaments from Indonesia, 10 of which have already been sold. It’s absolute madness they’ve taken this willy – it was right there in the shop window next to a statue of Venus and a replica of Michelangelo’s David, said the entrepreneur, who lives in Yarm. They involve boobs and willies – and there was a sign nearby saying Big Dick’s Sausages and they didn’t take that. Hadlow was given 24 hours to remove the stone penis. When officers returned and he hadn’t complied, it was put into a police van and Hadlow ordered to pay an £80 fine to release it or face court action. He added: The policewoman said it was 4ft tall. It’s not that high, but people do often overestimate when it comes to willy size. Hadlow has 21 days to pay the fine – but is hoping a Facebook group he set up called Free Willy will persuade the police to drop the charges – at the time the Evening Gazette went to print today he had 269 supporters online. A spokesman for the North Yorkshire Police dicks said: The owner of Simply Dutch was visited on March 31 following a complaint from a member of the public. He was given the opportunity to remove the offending item within 24 hours. Officers returned the next day and issued him with a penalty notice for disorder for committing a public order offence after his decision to leave the item on view.

Anyone But England…Police have a word with Scottish T-Shirt company

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Thanks to DarkAngel Based on article from uk.eurosport.yahoo.com See also slanjkilts.com

A Scottish clothing company has been warned by police over t-shirts expressing the hope that Anyone but England wins this summer’s World Cup. World Cup Anyone but England t-shirt. Police have warned proprietors of the Slanj clothing store in Aberdeen that the garment could cause offence. An impromptu visit from an officer raising concerns over the shirt’s sentiments left staff at the shop flabbergasted. The visit was not in response to a complaint, and no action has been taken against the company. However, Grampian Police claim that they would be neglecting their duty if the matter was not addressed. PC Kirk Hemmings said: The primary role of any police force is to preserve the peace and we would be failing in our duty if we did not make people aware of the potential for disturbance such a window display could cause. The Grampian area, in common with the rest of the country, has recorded incidents relating to nationality and we have a responsibility to do our best to ensure that incidents of this nature are kept to a minimum. Ross Lyle of Slanj said: To be honest we’re absolutely flabbergasted: We have been selling this T-shirt for the past three months and we’ve had a great response. Even the English people who come into the store think it’s a laugh and just a bit of tongue-in-cheek football banter. The t-shirt is described on Slanj’s website as A light hearted dig at our English neighbours and their prospects in the forthcoming World Cup, not that we’re bitter or anything, just because we didnae qualify!

Gangs of Censors…Police to screen warning about gangs at cinemas showing 1 Day

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Based on article from birminghampost.net

Birmingham police chiefs are to issue an on-screen warning about gun crime before a controversial new movie about gang life in Birmingham is shown on the big screen. 1 Day tells the story of two rival gangs caught up in the underworld of drugs and guns. The movie was filmed around Birmingham and stars local actors. Now police say they will place an advert ahead of any other screenings to highlight the real dangers inherent in gang-related criminality. The advert features an illuminated headstone with the catchline: Once upon a time, they were dying to join a gang. The film’s writer-director, Penny Woolcock, said: The film shows how people get sucked into that life and it clearly spells out the consequences, which is people end up dead or in prison. The film absolutely does not glamorise that lifestyle. It has a clear moral message. A force spokesman added: Our general advice is for individual cinemas to make a responsible and informed decision based upon local circumstances and taking into account the views of their local communities.